By request, a reposting of the snippets of Robin Hobb fic that I wrote forever ago.

None of these are finished ;_;

Title: Chivalry is Dead

Pairings: A dead man and an item of clothing, I suppose.

Warnings: For ILLEGALITY.

Summary: In a distant land, unmarked on any map, a red-scarfed fighter is making a name for himself.

Notes: This was a tiny thing that I wrote mostly to amuse myself. It isn't finished, and I mostly forgot where I was going with it anyway >.>; In my twisted mind, I sometimes like to think that Verity came to join him after awhile.

( Chivalry is Dead )


Title: This doesn't have a title other than "Foolfiction2".

Pairings: None really.

Warnings: For bad writing. The other piece that goes with this was so horrible when I went to look at the file that I'm too ashamed to post it here again.

Summary: You aren't born able to do backflips and write poetry on the spot, that's all I'm saying.

Notes: I'm surprised that there isn't more speculation about what the Fool did before he finally made it to Buckkeep.

( Lucas and the Fool )

Title: This one was rather ingeniously titled "Fool Drabble 1."

Pairings: Fitz and the Fool, kind of.

Warnings: For fake blood, disturbing imagery.

Summary: Fitz is probably slightly insane.

Notes: This piece and the one that goes with it was most peoples' favorite of the crap that I put out for the Farseer series. I was trying my hand at drabbles (100 word stories, supposed to be no more and no less, but of course I was too lazy to do that) and working off of a list of prompts, while following a story that kept playing itself out in my head. The prompts are listed next to the drabble pieces, as well as the number of words in the piece.

( Doll )

And the second part:

( Journey )

Hi, Ms. Hobb. I'm in ur sandbox, playin with ur dudes.

Yay, now I'm only nine thousand words behind. (D:)

Every time I catch up a little, I fall even farther behind. If I were where I'm supposed to be, I would be doing great-- I wrote 2000 words today and am probably going to write another 1k before I go to bed-- but it's after two AM, which means my wordcount goal has already increased...

...nano waits for no man.

Still really behind, despite doing a word war on Twitter.

Trying to catch up after too long not writing.

News on my nano coming as soon as I'm not supposed to be asleep.

Yeah I know, it's technically day three already, but my sleep schedule's all FUBAR.




Almost didn't write today; my plot needs spice.

Being me, I have decided to add sex. That'll pad my wordcount, right?

I've heard the Nano word count widgets aren't working, but I figured I'd try anyway, since all the 'off-brand' ones suck.



Let's hope it works, if not now, then in a few days.

EDIT: Yeah, the widgets are definitely down, so here's an old-school tickerfactory one instead:

"They're rare-- so rare that most of them never develop to their full potential. As children they talk late and prefer their own company to anyone else's. If they make it to adulthood they shrink away from society, live on their own and don't care for visitors. It's best to catch them young; by about twelve or thirteen their psyches are crippled beyond repair. Some commit suicide in their teens. Others develop strange obsessions, collecting mounds and mounds of things-- I saw buttons, shoe strings, sheets of paper. Teeth, once. He'd been going into graveyards and stealing them off corpses. He couldn't explain why beyond 'I have to.'

There are some 'success stories,' those who get labeled as eccentric instead of a lunatic or an idiot, those who spend all their time painting or scribbling on every available scrap of paper, those who have a connection to animals, those who have dreams of things before they happen.

If they're found, and cared for properly-- carefully, carefully, like an exotic flower-- well. You can imagine. But get two or three in a room and staff will start complaining of headaches and buzzing in their ears. Bring in a few more and your teeth start chattering. A whole building of them will drive animals mad, drop birds out of the sky. You can forget about any of your instruments working properly.

Delfies, they're called, after that Greek joint where women would scream nonsense that people thought were prophecies..."

Was out late doing Halloweenie stuff with kids ><; so tired. Hoping to be able to get to the M'Boro Nano Meet-up on the 27th.

Link for today: Write or Die. Will be using this in November.

( Jeanny Boy )

Jean lives by himself and prefers to keep to himself, hiring out his dog to pay for his tobacco habit (and matches). He's no angry hermit, and when he finds Kid wandering around in the swamp, covered in leeches and pond scum, he doesn't hesitate to take the boy in and give him a place to get clean and lie down. He doesn't seem bothered by Kid's lack of memories, either: after all, he's the one who can't explain why his dog shows up to work on time by itself every day.

With just a little over a week to go until Nano starts, I thought I'd try doing a little bit of worldbuilding every day in order to be raring to go November 1st. This is the first Nanovel that I've done where I know more about the plot than the characters, and character profiles are a good place to start anyway, so:

( Kid, Kiddo, or Number 28 )

Kid is at once eager, and afraid, to find out who he is and where he came from. As the number of disturbing dreams and flashbacks he has increases, and he discovers that he's able to do things with his mind that others can't, he becomes less and less able to live a quiet life and ignore his past.

[This text, and the accompanying scans, were ripped mercilessly from Book in a Month: the fool-proof system for writing a novel in 30 days by Victoria Lynn Schmidt, Ph.D. I did not ask permission from Dr. Schmidt to transcribe large swaths of her shiny book. I totally will not justify my theft by pointing out that “Doctor” Schmidt stole the idea of a novel in a month from Chris Baty anyway, and gives him no credit whatsoever.

I’ve only copied and scanned the bits of the book important for plot structure. If you’d like to see the rest of the worksheets (they’re pretty cool) and Schmidt’s advice on things like character, setting, scene building etc, please purchase the book on Amazon.com or at some other fine bookstore.]

Worksheet One: ( clickie )

The Setup: The setup provides readers with the direction of the story. It gives all the information needed to get the story rolling, conveys the story genre, and establishes the pacing.

The Mood or Tone: What about your story could convey mood or tone to readers? Is there a particular setting or character that encapsulates the feel of the story? Think about this for a moment: what if your story opened in a graveyard? Or a bank? Each location sets a different mood.

The Hook, Catalyst, or Inciting Incident: This is a dynamic event that draws readers into the story. The main goal or problem may not be stated just yet, but something happens that piques interest. It can be an action (someone is murdered), a dialogue (a character receives a mysterious phone call), or a situation (a character is thrust into circumstances he may not be able to handle). This is the initial problem or situation that will become more complicated as the main goal or problem is introduced, which forces conflict.

The Serious Problem and/or Goal: Why do we care? What is at stake? Don’t be afraid to make things hard on your characters. You should always come up with several different problems to choose from. Who knows, you may even throw numerous problems at them at once. Think about the type of story you are writing and the genre you want to work in—what kinds of problems do characters usually have in these stories? How can you make your story different? This first serious problem or goal drives the story forward, so make it good. It motivates the main character and, when combined with the initial problem, adds that crucial first dose of conflict that’s going to grow throughout the story. Each genre has its own type of expected problems and conflict:

- Romance: relationship conflict
- Horror: life and death conflict
- Drama: everyday problems intensified
- Comedy: everyday problems exaggerated
- Mystery: knowledge-related conflict

The Villain: Who or what opposes the main character? Somehow, you need to introduce the villain. You can show him in a brief scene that conveys his villainous behavior, you can have other characters talk about him foreshadowing his arrival, or you can infer that something is coming but is, as of yet, unknown.

The Main Characters: All of the main characters need to be introduced as soon as possible. It would be great to introduce all the supporting characters as well, but remember to keep you cast of characters to a bare minimum. It’s very difficult to follow more than four main characters at a time. [sentence about naming characters left out for ridiculousness] You can combine several characters into one character: instead of having a lawyer and a chiropractor, have a lawyer/chiropractor [TYPIST: or an accountant/circus freak!], or a lawyer who handles medical law.

The Turning Point: A turning point is like a cliffhanger, or a moment where the story is taken in a new direction and we wonder what will happen next. A turning point may accomplish a variety of functions, such as pushing the story in a new direction or asking questions that make us wonder about the outcome of the story.

Theme: A theme is a recurring motif usually provoked by the turning point question. As the central question or conflict is presented again and again throughout the course of the story, and as the stakes are continually raised, how the character responds will determine the overall theme for the story. You don’t need to identify or make your theme concrete at this point, but you will inevitably find yourself writing toward it from the very beginning.

Act I Turning Point

A turning point is basically an event or new information that turns the story in a new direction, for the readers or for the character (sometimes readers know what will happen but the character doesn’t). The best turning points are ones where readers have no idea it is coming. On one page readers think things will go one way, then the next page (turning point) everything changes, and the readers are excited about the possibilities. Example:

The heroine meets the love of her life, and readers expect the story to progress along, leading to a marriage at the end. Readers are enjoying the story, but not expecting too much, when all of a sudden the heroine sees the hero with another woman but can’t be sure about what is going on. Now what the readers assumed was going to happen may not happen; something is at stake here.

Or: The heroine meets the love of her life… then she gets news that he only has six months to live.

Or: The heroine meets the love of her life… but he has a secret life.

Or: The heroine meets the love of her life… then she walks out of her office building and finds someone shooting at her.

Things have been turned around in a new direction! Write down your Act I turning point, then brainstorm a bit to see if there are any other ideas you can use, any other directions you can go in, or different character reactions to this turning point that could spice things up. Play with your turning point to see if it brings up any possibilities. Think about:

1. What is the exact opposite that could happen at this turning point?

2. What is the most outrageous thing that could happen at this point?

3. What would happen if you brought in another character?

4. How do you want readers to react or feel at this point?

(“You can’t wait for inspiration. You have to go after it with a club.” -- Jack London)

Act Two

In Act I, we established the basics of our story, introduced our main characters to set the book’s tone, provided our protagonist with an initial problem to contend with, and then complicated things by adding a secondary serious problem. It is this serious problem, and how it informs or complicates the initial one, that creates the central conflict of the story for our protagonist and leads to our book’s first crucial turning point… leading us to Act Two. How will the protagonist react to the conflict he’s been presented with? Is he up to the challenge? Will things get worse before they get better? The question for us, as writers, becomes one of how to navigate the protagonist through the difficult waters ahead—while making those waters a little deeper, a little riskier as we go—to create a compelling and dynamic second act.

The Problem Intensifies: There are three possible ways in which the problem can intensify here: barriers, complications, and situations.

BARRIERS occur when the character tries something and it doesn’t work. There character must change directions or try another approach. (for example, the heroine tries to talk to get into the church to stop the wedding but the doors are locked, and several goons were told to watch for her and keep her out.)

COMPLICATIONS are action points that don’t pay off immediately. Something new is introduced, be it a character or problem, that makes the current problem even worse than it already seems. (for example, an ex-girlfriend comes in when the hero is about to tell the heroine why he stood her up the other night; now the heroine’s imagination is really in overdrive.)

SITUATIONS are when new dramatic circumstances or predicaments happen to a character to move the story forward and add tension. The story may take a bit of a detour as the entire beginning, middle, and end of a new situation or incident plays out; or the situation can be played out in pieces throughout the second act. (for example, the main character finds out his sister was arrested for narcotics and now his entire political campaign is in jeopardy.)

Temporary Triumph: The main character thinks she has achieved her goal, but this triumph is short-lived. A reversal is just around the corner.

The temporary triumph comes at the end of Act Two, part one (the halfway mark). This is when the main character thinks she has achieved her goal, but unbeknownst to her, there is a reversal just waiting around the corner (as we wait for the reversal, the subplot could come into the picture for awhile.) The temporary triumph makes the character feel as if he has attained his goal and the story is over. He achieves something great and thinks, “whew! That was tough, but I succeeded.” Then he turns the corner and wham! He’s right back to square one, or worse. Here are some examples:

- He found the lost treasure! But wait—it’s only fool’s gold.
- She got the job of her dreams and can now support her family! Oh no, it was just a scam and she already quit her old crappy job.
- He found the love of his life and can let himself love again after going through a horrible divorce! Wait—she’s already married and not interested in anything long-term.
- She discovered a cure for baldness! Oops—it has horrible side effects and her company is being sued.

Remember that the temporary triumph needs to push the character towards his ultimate goal. Look at where you want that character to be in the end of the story. How can you use the temporary triumph to support that ending?

(The book doesn’t go into a whole lot of detail on this, but does provide examples from the two books she frequently references. Here’s the one from Dracula:

Lucy is attacked and killed by a wolf that storms her room—but Dr. Van Helsing, having seen the bite marks on her neck, realizes that she is not truly dead but undead and convinces Lucy’s would-be suitors to accompany him to the crypt, where they find the formerly vivacious young woman transformed into a creature of the night. In order to save her, Van Helsing cuts off her head and stuffs her mouth with garlic, thereby reuniting her soul with God. Meanwhile, Harker is reunited with Mina [who Dracula wants as his bat-bride], thanks to the assistance of a kindly convent that takes them in. Harker and Mina are married, though readers sense this “triumphant” moment is merely the calm before the storm.

You can also find a “triumphant moment” in almost every Disney movie.)

Act Two Worksheets: ( clickie )

Character Motivation

(the author waffles a bit about what motivates your characters, and that it’s important, especially after the ass-kicking they’ve received in act II, to go over them and make sure the characters are still after the same thing they were in act I, or if it’s changed.)

- Are your main characters moving toward pleasure or away from pain? Or both?
- What reward awaits the hero in the end?
- What is motivating the hero to press on?

[Don’t forget that your villains need motivation too, or they’ll get bored and leave.]

(An example from Dracula again:
The Count wants to “win” the girl—though his definition of winning may be different from ours—but why? He believes she is his long-lost love. He believes she belongs to him, and he wants to save her from death and human frailty. He doesn’t want to be alone anymore. A part of him also wants to show the other men who are trying to destroy him that he all-powerful and gets what he wants.)

When thinking about your own characters, remember that motivations tend to evolve as circumstances change, small goals are accomplished, and new problems tend to arise. A character’s motivation needs to be clear to readers at all times, and this motivation must be scene-specific and tailor-made for the individual character. When exploring motivation options for a specific character, consider his flaws, as well as his goals. Think about the various small goals he may have already accomplished, and the different types of resistance he faces in the specific scene you’re writing, as well as those he’s likely to encounter throughout the course of the story.

Act Two, Part Two

In the first part of Act Two, we intensified the conflict, first by adding new barriers, complications, and situations for our hero to contend with, and then by raising the hero’s hopes with an all-too-temporary triumph. So where does that leave us, the writers, in the second part of act two? Remember when we talked about how things will get worse before they get better?

Reversal: Now the problem worsens. The triumph is no longer a true triumph, and the main character’s trials are not over by a long shot.

Dark Moment: The reversal leads to the dark moment. The main character fails (or at least seems to), or the main character thinks things are just too much to handle. Think of action films where the hero has a confrontation with the villain and barely gets out alive. The problem gets worse for the main character, and his goal is pushed further out of reach. We wonder if we will ever succeed because it seems as if all is lost.

(Example from Dracula:
Harker, Van Helsing, and Lucy’s former suitors set off to find the Count’s store of Transylvanian soil to destroy it, but, unbeknownst to them, Renfield, a mental patient in contact with the Count, leads the Count to the hospital where Mina had been sequestered. The men arrive back at the hospital moments too late; the Count has bitten Mina, seduced her, and her fate seems sealed. She is—or soon will be—a vampire herself. Mina’s only hope now is for the men to track down the Count and kill him, freeing her from his grip, but the clock is ticking.)

Turning Point: This turning point accomplishes the same things as the first turning point at the end of Act I. The one difference is that the main character is usually forced into making a decision that propels this turning point.

( The sacred dirt from his homeland effectively sterilized by the men chasing him, the Count’s weaknesses catch up with him, and he must get home to lay in fresh dirt. If the men catch the Count before he reaches his home soil and his castle, there may be hope for Mina. But if not…)

Develop your Villain

How is your villain doing? He helps initiate the story in Act one, then he usually takes a backseat while the main characters take over a bit in act two. But right about now is when he needs to come back onto the scene full force. He needs to create more tension to push the hero toward the finale.
[author takes awhile to say: your villain has got to be legit, or your story will suck.]
Now that you are nearing the end of act two, part two, you need to think a bit about how the villain will help the hero shine in act three. Even if your hero will be defeated in the end, the hero should still remain sympathetic and likeable, someone readers feel for. And our perception of the hero is always colored—sometimes subtly, sometimes in broad strokes—by our perception of the villain.
First, your villain needs some redeeming qualities. He may be bad, but he usually has a reason for being bad; perhaps he has been victimized himself. Indeed, he may truly believe he is being good, think of the religious zealot who believes he has to kill someone to save or “purify” them.
Second, your villain needs a skill that equals or surpasses the hero’s skill in some way. This skill can be different from what the hero can do, but just as powerful. We usually don’t get to see it until near the end of act three. This way, the stakes are made higher in the moments before the final confrontation.
Third, your villain needs a weakness that can be exploited in the finale. You also need to find a way to let the hero find out about this weakness. If possible, your villain should also find out about the hero’s weakness in the finale but be unable to defeat the hero.

Keep your Hero Motivated

As you move closer to act three, you may want to have your hero get a glance at his reward to remind him why he his doing this. Let him see what he will gain from the coming finale if he succeeds. Don’t make it too obvious. If he is going to win a thousand dollars, you don’t have to show him a billboard covered in dollar signs. Try to be more subtle than that; simply having him watch a person of wealth getting into and driving away in his Ferrari will make the point, for the character as well as the readers.

Keep your Villain Motivated

Just as you did a Reward Glance for your hero, you should also do one for your villain. The stronger his desire for his goal, the more he will fight against the hero. The key here is to make sure the villain’s goal is in direct conflict with the hero’s goal. It’s as if the villain’s goal forces him to make sure the hero’s goal does not happen. They come into direct conflict with each other.

Act Three

In act two, our hero enjoyed what looked to be a triumph; then, the situation reversed and led to the darkest moment yet for the hero and/or for those around him—by all accounts, the point of no return. But, in truth, this was not point of no return at all; rather, it was act two’s crucial turning point, leading the hero toward a final showdown with the villain and leading us to act three. But there’s one thing standing our hero’s way before he can confront the villain, one last obstacle he must face in order to earn the right to face the villain and, hopefully, resolve the conflict once and for all.

Final Obstacle: The main character is forced, through the momentum of the turning point, to face one last huge obstacle. He is pushed to the limit not just physically, but mentally and emotionally as well. If the main character is going to be successful, this is where he sets up the villain to be destroyed.

Climax: The main character comes face to face with the villain. The problem is either resolved and the goal accomplished, or vice versa.

Resolution: All loose ends are tied up. All subplots are resolved, and the main character reflects on the events of the story. Has he changed at all? How has the story affected him? What are his attitudes about the events he just went through?